What?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

We just found out this week that we are expecting Baby #3 sometime in January. I couldn't sleep the night we found out. I tossed and turned and finally fell into a fitful sleep at around 1:00 AM. Not because I was upset, but because there were lots of emotions heaping up around me. I had some anxiety, some excitement and some shock. I just really wasn't sure I was going to have more. Anna Kate will be 5 in August. We had kind of started wanting a third one around the time Anna Kate was almost 2 but I had been on this nasty medication for my RA and I had to wait two whole years after going off of it to try again. (Keep in mind the rheumatologist didn't give me this little warning when he put me on it--I found it out for myself.) I could have also taken meds to get me off the meds (sounds ludicrous, I know!) and when I prayed about doing so, it just seemed as if the Holy Spirit was telling me wait! So, we waited.


I really figured by the time that the two years had passed that I would either feel too old to have another or that my insides would be so messed up again that I couldn't conceive. The two years were up January of 2008. Do you remember what we were doing at that time? MOVING!!!!!! I really wasn't up for more change at that point. I was in transition, money was extremely tight, Scott had started a new job, the kids were a little unsettled and I was babysitting. It just didn't seem like it was time.


Finally, I started feeling like I might want to try at least for one more. I vacillated back and forth constantly. Scott had wanted another one for awhile and my endo has been flaring up and I figured I had better try. I used my trusty little monitor once. However, it made my mind focus on what might not happen rather than what God has already blessed me with. I made the decision to not rely on the monitor this time and that if God wanted to bless again, then so be it.


I took the test one night before bedtime and laid it on the shelf in the bathroom. I came out and started getting things ready for bed and thought "I better go check that test even though it's probably not positive". My jaw dropped when I picked it up. I walked out in the hallway and said "Scott, you won't believe..." Anna Kate and Ben were saying, "What, what?" (We didn't tell them right then--I needed it to sink in) We walked into the bedroom in disbelief and then stopped ourselves...why in the world were we surprised? God gave us Ben and Anna Kate, why couldn't He give us another? I don't know about everyone else, but when God does something amazing for us, I turn around in disbelief sometimes and I don't know why!


So, was it planned? Sort of...but we both figured my plumbing was all broken again. I have been having a horrible time with the endo lately. However, God blessed again in His time and for that I am thankful. Surprised that my insides worked but thankful.